Burned by Business Coaches & Consultants? How to Find the Right Support Without Wasting (More) Money

It can be the Wild West trying to find the right support.

Let me start by saying this: I love receiving support.

Being witnessed in my business. Having someone hold strategy with me. Feeling a sacred mirror reflect both my vision and my blind spots. I’ve worked with incredible mentors, some of whom radically changed the trajectory of my work. AND I, along with so many others I’ve spoken with, have been experienced the flip side of this.

Sales conversations that leave us feeling icky, unseen and turned off.
Programs and projects with beautiful landing pages but unfulfilling results.
Consultants and coaches who are navigating their own emotional wounding and bleeding all over us in the process.

No one wants to spend resources and receive the above outcome (at least, that’s my guess!).

So how do we find aligned, trustworthy support, without wasting more money, energy, or time?

Let’s talk about it.

First, let’s name what’s real:

There are brilliant, heart-led coaches, consultants and strategists doing deep, transformative work in the world.
There are also consultants who have learned to say the right things online, but haven’t walked the path they’re trying to guide you through.

And in this era of online business, where social proof is often curated and image can be engineered, discernment becomes essential.

Yes, there’s something to be said about people not necessarily needing schooling, credentialing or bells-and-whistles to be effective.
But that doesn’t mean effectiveness, precision and delivering on promises needs to be out the door either.

You get to be selective about who you’re letting into your business. That’s sacred ground.

Your energy and money are sacred. Let’s treat them that way.

When you’re hiring someone to guide or support you - whether it’s a business coach, strategist, OBM, or operations partner - it’s not just about their charisma or vibe. It’s about their craft. Their capacity. Their actual approach.

So many founders say yes too quickly because the person "feels right"… and overlook the fact that their process isn’t actually built for your needs.

Let yourself slow down. Interview them just as much as they interview you.

Here are a few questions I recommend asking when considering working with someone:

• What specific results have your clients experienced?
  (They don’t need to guarantee numbers, but they should be able to name what transformation they help facilitate.)
• What are the core principles that guide your work?
  (This tells you how they think about and walk their clients towards success, and whether your philosophies align.)
• Who is not a good fit for your container?
  (This is one of my favorite questions. A provider who can name their boundaries is usually someone who’s spent time refining their craft.)
• Where are your clients typically in their journey when they come to you?
  (You want to make sure they’re not just regurgitating the same frameworks you’ve already outgrown.)

And if you’re still unsure? Ask others.
Not just those featured in testimonials - talk to people you know, trust, or follow who’ve worked with them. If they’re a consultant with integrity, they won’t be threatened by that. They’ll welcome it.

Transparency is a love language

One of the things I now look for in a provider is transparency about their own journey.
Where did they get the hands-on experience that they will be guiding me through? Do they have a background in the skill I’m seeking support with?  How have they continued developing their craft over time?

That level of honesty goes far beyond a glossy brand - it signals embodiment and craftsmanship.

Surround yourself with artisans

Here’s a perspective that changed everything for me: treat your support team like an ecosystem of artisans.

Whether it’s your coach, your copywriter, your designer, or your operations strategist, choose people who take their craft seriously. Who are devoted to their work. Who see it as a calling, not just a paycheck.

I do this with every person I bring in, from my software providers to my nail technician. (Shoutout to Bella - a true genius with a nail bevel.)

It doesn’t mean they have to have the fanciest branding or the most followers.
But it does mean they have to be passionate and experienced.

Your next level deserves more than charisma

I’m not here to tell you to never invest again.
I’m here to tell you that your nervous system gets to be part of the decision-making process.
That your standards are a form of self-respect.
And that finding the right support is not a game of luck - it’s a skill of discernment you can absolutely cultivate.

And when you do find the right support? It’s magic.
You move faster. You feel held. You don’t just grow your business, you grow into more of who you really are.

You deserve that. Your business deserves that. And that people who will have their lives transformed by the work you do deserve that.

In service,

If this transmission stirred something in you, there’s more where that came from.
I write love letters for the femme founder wanting to build her business empire with clarity, precision and clarity.

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